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Wednesday, August 09, 2006

..........AND WE SUCKED

Ah, the eighties, how thee sucked. Hell, the nineties sucked too, and there were even some suckdom during my beloved seventies, but the eighties, well, I guess that's superior suck.

What do you mean, Jackson?

The Hooters.

I know Mick sings "be bop baby at the union hall" in 'Rip This Joint', and I assume that he got it from a black man, but in the hands, or vocal chords, of The Hooters it sounds so lame.

I'm (not really) watching (again) VH1 Decades Classic Live - Cyndi Lauper.

I dig Cindy.

She's so unusual.


Unfortunately, I learned from this episode that the Hooters guys wrote a lot of her catalog.


That's like finding out that Santa is your geeky cousin who you can't stand.

Props to Cindy for slagging it out these lo so many, many years.

Props for 'Shebop' - despite who wrote it, I gotta figure she had a hand in that one - DOH!

Props for doing 'Another Brick In The Wall Pt. 2' at Roger's Berlin thing.

Props for the enduring deep New York drawl.

All props aside - the Heart episode rocked much harder, two words - No Hooters.

I never thought I'd say no hooters is a good thing.

I think that's part of the problem.

They called themselves the Hooters. I'd say you better have some, and nice ones too.

Ah the eighties, when bad ideas were so lucrative.

Scott Wieland is sort of unusual, but he thinks he's Bowie, wich isn't very unusual really. He likes Cindy, so I guess he's okay.

There's some haircut going 'ooh ooh' all over everything. He's in some popular band I can't think of because I don't care. He sucks worse than the Hooters guys. We should send him back to the eighties.

Oh shit - now there's one of these Dancehall Reggae guys, y'know the guys who don't really say anything, but they cram a zillion syllables into a phrase. He's fun. I like him much better than Haircuts and Hooters.

Good post... I will go on the record as saying that we knew then that much of what was popular back in the eighties and ninties sucked.

How's the move going? Give us an update man.
I'd rather keep you in suspense.
Shall we start a definitive list of those who really sucked? I submit the following for your approval:

Night Ranger
There is nothing wrong with Night Ranger or Loverboy. Nothing. And for suggesting that, you, my friend, cannot still Rock in America.

Meaningless trivia: after they were done being popular, The Hooters shortened their name to 'Hooters'. This pleases me to no end.

Still, 'Time After Time' is one of the sadder, more poignant music videos. Really, you old cranks complaining about '80s music are starting to sound like my parents.
Although my dad doesn't quote 'Rip This Joint'.
Why, when I was your age, sonny, we had heroin delivered like milk!
Dancehall reggae guys don't really say anything? I KNOW Legal Diva taught you better than THAT!!!! Jackson, you need a lesson in the deep lyricism of dancehall reggae. I agree that there's plenty of fluff around, but the best stuff has SUBSTANCE, not just some people cramming a whole bunch of syllables into a rhythm. Being a dancehall artist myself, I felt an obligation to set you straight...Legal Diva will hear about this. LOL
I've just communicated with THE JUDGE and I've been informed that you are to make a public apology for your comments or you will be cut off from ummmmm the stuff you like so much. Good luck Jackson.
Well I guess I deserve a schoolin', though I was certainly luring you with that remark. In the end, it was Shaggy, so, um...what's up there?

School me. Certainly. But really Robbie, what is going on with the taosting these days, I guess the fact that I can't understand what's mbeing said is of no signifigance, but really, I can't understand anything that's going on except some cool syncopation within endless repetition.

Hey! I said it was fun! I said I liked it BETTER - leave me alone, methinks the lady doth protest too much.
The hardcore rhythms nowadays don't have a whole bunch of depth, but if you listen to certain artists like Junior Gong, Queen Omega, and Bounty Killer you'll hear musical and lyrical depth way beyond Shaggy and Sean Paul's party anthems. The popular stuff is rarely deep (in most genres). Maybe if you understood patois better, you'd appreciate the music & style that gave birth to hip-hop.
Indeed, fluff rises above depth, but depth endures.

The Legal D has certainly helped me appreciate Junior Gong, though I don't necesarily associate him with Dancehall.
Junior Gong, Buju Banton,Queen Omega and many others are all highly regarded in dancehall circles as well as traditional reggae circles. They are to reggae/dancehall what Lauryn Hill was to Hip-Hop/R&B. Peep Buju's "Til Shiloh" as an example of a well-rounded reggae/dancehall masterpiece.
Stinkrock, old crank that I am, I thought the aforementioned bands sucked when I was a young crank. My opinion on this matter has been consistent over the ages. The only use I have for them now is for gag gifts and that funny, sheephish, nostalgic feeling one gets when you see them advertised on some K-Tel "Sounds of the Eighties" commercial.


Hmmmm. Well the first Nightranger record showed promise, but when they let the drummer have a song on the second record, well, I cannot get behind that horrid tune.

As for Loverboy, gotta say, they had some good tunes. Not overly exiting visually, but competent.
I am withdrawing my nominations for the definitive suck list. The silver lining arguments are hard to beat. Guess I'll go listen to some Wang Chung.
I just might Wang Chung tonight, as soon as I figure out how.
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