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Friday, September 22, 2006


Carolina at Tampa Bay
1:00 p.m. - Tampa handed third straight loss. Chucky to seek new career in Hollywood.

Chicago at Minnesota
1:00 p.m. - Chicago rolls on, beating a better but not good enough Vikings.

Cincinnati at Pittsburgh
1:00 p.m. - Pittsburgh is shown the door by this years model, the Bengals. There will be no repeat by the Steelers.

Green Bay at Detroit
1:00 p.m. - Unable compute. A team has to score to win, right? No score, games ends after a record four hour overtime. Mob, er, cough, Union Bosses break up the game to the relief of football fans everywhere.

Jacksonville at Indianapolis
1:00 p.m. - A tired and deeply disturbed Peyton Manning, waking up after a dreadful nightmare in which he was QB for Green Bay, has a terrible game throwing forty-nine interceptions. Jacksonville wins despite their own offensive problems due to too much laughter on the sidelines watching Peyton toss the ball away.

N.Y. Jets at Buffalo
1:00 p.m. - J. E. T. S. - Jets, Jets, Jets! Cotchery learns to fly.

Tennessee at Miami
1:00 p.m. - Miami proves that even they can beat the 'orrible Tennessee Titans.

Washington at Houston
1:00 p.m. - See above. Insert Washington for Miami and Houston for Tennessee. Scientists prove that Joe Gibbs actually died many years ago. Unfortunately Redskins ownership decides the JoeBot is good enough.

Baltimore at Cleveland
4:05 p.m. - Poor Cleveland. I hate the Ravens, but I don't like the Browns enough to deny the fact that Baltimore will crush them.

N.Y. Giants at Seattle
4:15 p.m. - G-Men win spectacular road win against heavily favored Seahawks. Holmgren eats his offensive line after Strahan walks all over them, like so many silly girls, for a record 172 sacks.

Philadelphia at San Francisco
4:15 p.m. - Philly gain no succor from easily trouncing this bunch of sissy boys from the city by the bay.

St. Louis at Arizona
4:15 p.m. - I suppose some people in Arizona or the midwest care. I don't. St. Louis wins, Kurt Warner gets confused and shows up in his Rams uniform.

Denver at New England
8:15 p.m. - Denver wins. Tom Brady caught in hotel with sheep.

Atlanta at New Orleans
8:30 p.m. - Monday - New Orleans win Home opener in what turns out to be a track meet; Bush vs Vick.

The Cowboys are such pussies that they lose their bye week.

Good man, last week 63%. I'm placing my bets based on your picks. Too bad you don't do college ball.
Well, Fatsacca, you should know that I always pick the Jets, Giants, and Saints to win regarless of logic, same goes for the Pats and Dallas losing.
Thank you Ted for this week’s pics and commentary. Times are a changing, I am looking forward to a Monday night football game that is featuring The Saint’s plus they and the Falcon’s are 2-0….Is it Monday yet. Ted, the Steelers will end the Cincinnati run once again…even Chad and the Dead man leg QB ain’t got nothing on Big Ben, Heinz and company…Come on Carolina and Skins its time to get in the race….Dallas still sucks even when they are at home resting their ring finger and taking lines of coke off the cheerleaders titis…TO, Michael Irving….Dallas will be Dallas
With the exception of the Saints game, I'd take your picks to the bank. The Cowboys need to take the week off in order to wash their delicates and get their nails done.

BTW... Army upset Baylor in OT last night. Looks like the game against Texas A&M was no fluke. The cadets might just have game.

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